Late night ramblings

Some people I know are so good at writing it almost makes me want to stop….one in particular puts words together like she is sewing a new shirt and every piece fits perfectly.  If my writing was a shirt being sewed it would look like one of those Christmas sweaters with one arm longer than the other …you know the ones I mean. My life sometimes gets like that too…..Certain parts fit perfect…while other parts are like that long sleeve that just doesn’t fit. I have always said albeit tongue in cheek that you can explain everything with a sports metaphor. Life is like Golf….you see in golf you have different aspects of the game….ie putting, driving, irons, short game…it seems for most hackers like myself when one part of your game is working another is just missing in action. One day you can putt good, and you can’t hit off the tee very well, while on another day you are getting off the tee well and you are hitting your irons great, but you can’t putt to save your ass. Life can be like that….but I believe that like golf you just have to keep working to improve your game (or your life) the best way you can. So I am doing just that…keep on going forward, don’t let anything stop you….and never stop being who you really are, believe in your self…or don’t doubt yourself. That is where I am in life right now….Some things are working, and some things are not…but I will just keep working…trying to mesh it all together so I don’t end up with one sleeve longer than the other….When problems hit I tend to bury inside…let the fire burn inside so no one will see the flame…part of that reason is…..(and I am not doing a poor me thing here just stating a fact I am ok with) I just don’t have anyone at this stage of my life I trust to really open up and talk about things with. I am actually comfortable with just letting it burn inside…There have been times in my life where that has been the case and have grown to get comfortable with that. That is not a cry for help…just being real…telling it like it is.

One part of my life that is working well is when I spend time with my little man Nolan. Nothing could ever bring me more joy that the times we spend together doing something…or nothing. I did something right in God’s eyes for him to bring that little man in my life. He (God) blessed my life with Nolan…..I am lucky enough to spend lots and lots of time with him. When I saw him in the NICU and I was the first one to change his little diaper in between all those wires and tubes I  knew that instant that Nolan Tyler Wilson and I would have a special bond. He has made me change who I am…no matter what anyone thinks….for the better. I have reading him a bedtime story every night from the first day we brought him home from the hospital….He told me he is a daddys boy forever tonight…so no matter what happens in other parts of my life good or bad….nothing could outweigh the good that little man brings in my life….I thank God every day for him….So the bad I keep inside…cause I just don’t trust Y’all out there…sorry…The two things I know I can count on is ….God loves me for the broken man I am…and the blessing God has put in my life by the name of Nolan Tyler Wilson. Good Night all….GKW

Focus on the good….work on the bad….be nice

Focus on the good….work on the bad….be nice.…is going to be my motto for the rest of this year and 2012 so I thought it would be a good header for my long overdue blog update.

So here I sit  on a  on a cool Friday morning  looking out the window of my home office feeling good about it being Friday and just feeling good overall….this is after being a little down yesterday following my monthly visit at the Rex Cancer Center. My platelet numbers are again up this time to 800,000. That is up from 756,000 last month, which was up from 680,000 the month before that. My internal response is WTF….I mean seriously….I am doing everything they are telling me to do….ALL my other numbers look great, and they said to me yesterday they just don’t understand why my platelets are going in the wrong direction…but they are. The good news is I feel awesome….I am probably in the best shape I have been in in 5 years or so…my energy is great….I am hitting the gym 3 to 5 times a week, I am eating healthy most of the time,  and I went a hard 45 min’s on the ecliptic machine at the gym last night and worked chest. I am down to 206 from 228 a year a go. So all is good and I figure all I can do is try and stay healthy and stay positive. The danger zone or red line for platelets is 1,000,000….and although I am headed in that direction…I am not there yet, and my hope is it will turn the other way on my next visit….I will add that the Dr’s at the Rex Cancer Center tell me that stress is or can be a contributor and when I gave them a list of things that were giving me stress in my life they looked at me with a furrowed eyebrow and said it needs to be reduced….without  giving a list of things that bring me stress in my life on here ….I will say  that some are out of my control. I am working on trying to reduce some of the areas that are bringing me stress, but again there is only so much I can do…So that is it on the medical front.

City Politics:

Some of you might know I was elected last year as the vice chair of the North Central CAC about a year a go. In the last year I planned to and feel like I have been able to accomplish a couple different things. Not the least of them was build trust in the neighborhood and with the present CAC officers. I have also worked very hard to build a working relationship with the present Chair. Another thing I have wanted to do is meet and build a network with various departments in the City of Raleigh and get to know other CAC officers via the RCAC. I feel like I have accomplished all these goals, but in some ways I have just scratched the surface of things I would like to do to make the neighborhood my family and I live in. Because of that I have decided that I am putting hat in the ring to run for a 2nd term as Vice Chair. Some of the things I would like to accomplish in the next term is add some level of technology to this CAC starting with some kind of basic web page or facebook page. Although I am told there is already one in place I would like to re-institute a neighborhood watch at the very least in the blocks surrounding my house. These things as well as continue to build my relationship with…The present chair, the neighborhood I support, the city services dept, and the other chairs that are part of the RCAC. If I am lucky enough to be re-elected and serve another term I think I can continue to make the neighborhood better safer place to live. Oh one other thing I want to do is better engage St Aug’s college and see more buy in from them at times when they are not needing something. We have to help those who can’t help themselves, but we have to do more than just that….in transitional neighborhoods like this one we need to we need to make sure the neighborhoods are safe from crime….ie prostitution, drugs gangs etc…One of the safe ways to do that for neighbors is communication which is why two of the initiatives I will attempt to work on are the web site, and the neighborhood watch.    Well I will keep you up dated on this front as well….